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paraphernælia
3.26.2005 total inebriation
lose all inhibitions.
dats me..lol

i am not a fuckin happy fuckin camper.
in factim reali pissed off at da moment.

see this is exactly fuckin why i dunt open my big trap. this is why ni dunt let ppl in and i keep my own. i mean fuckin what?
i hate havin ppl judgin me not only dat but judgin me and comin up with a bad tab. i mean i can not care but i do and den ill think why da fuck do i justify myself why shud i feel bad for sumthin dats beyond my control why shud i let ppls shit get me down i mean so wat fuck if were different. so nuthin. ppl change get da fuck over it.


I HATE DAT GODDAMMED FUCKIN LINE I HATE IT I HATE IT.
IF ANYONE FUCKIN USES IT ON ME AGAIN ILL SCREAM.

who gives a shit anyway i think dat if u noe me u noe me and if i surprise u u dunt noe everythin u thought u did noe bout me and if deres nuthin u think u dunt need to noe bout me well den deres actualli alot u dunt noe bout me. i think dat alot of ppl noe but but dunt noe me besides how do u noe its all not a show. xactly u dunt. wat u will noe to know me is the little things dat are jus wat im about. i personally dunt care but den again i do i do wen i shudent and dats wat makes me hate myself. like its not like its me alone and its not like it me not being me when i do what i do. its still me and wat u can accept is wat is real.

i mean how u can define a person and how can u stereotype sumthin dat is so individual and so temporary i mean deres a million ways dat life ca work out for everyone and a million and one ways it can change depending on the decisions other ppl make. the whole butterfly effect thingy so who are u to say who we are to be.
i mean jus think about it everything is connected and some ppl call this god.
and some ppl call this fate and some ppl jus say fuck it dere no point in regrettin anythin.

but it doesnt matter does it. and i try to get ppl to understand but so far its bin tricky. i think dat dey can try to understand or they can not try and if dey dunt try den deres no point. and i think i dunt regret nuthin. so deres no point.

fuck this i think ive made my point somewhere in all of dat.. see if u can find it.
lol
now excuse me im goin outside to speed up the prcess of my death by smoking a box of cigarettes. wat a way to die. constantine anyone?

Blood and Honour
My Honour is Loyalty
Perfect by Nature

flipside baby..

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