its crazy how fast you grow up.
realli.. its funny how ur life is jus laid out before you without u actualli havin any idea of whats going on around u.
when youre young u feel invincible. i still sorta do i guess. but you think you know everything and dat u know everything better den anyone else. dont listen to no one dont care about no one. there are the ppl u keep for the rest of your life and theres everyone else. its just so crazy looking back to rs and thinking about all the dumb things dat made "such the impact" on my life..
it just seems that everything i balwed my heart out for was sooo... trivial.
the real world is nothing like that. its fucked. you cant trust anyone but since that leaves u with no one u kinda just have to take your chances.. falling in out of love with different ppl.. its crazy how many times ive said i love you to someone in high skool. maybe 100. and it was all so cool. oh ive got a bf..
WOW
no shit.
it was all so easy and straightforward there. comfort in everything. over here? every day is a fight. u keep ur head down here. ppl dunt want to just be your friend. deres always a superior motive. there are exceptions of course as always. but i learnt to be smart the hard way.
a dark time in my life
im over it.
so why is it still haunting me.
why am i afraid of someone jus showing up in my own home.
why am i still drowning myself in alcohol and drugs
why do i wake up from bad dreams
its not going to happen again.
never.
i hope they find him and put him away.
ive grown so much.. probably more in these past two years then i have in my life. a whirlwind of new discovery. the journey of life yea? heh. sure...
haha its funny looking baq.. i was such a silly lil girl. haha gave da teachers a good amount of shit though. that was fun. i was so taking advantage of the fact that i was untouchable.
and now?
ive bin degraded to a babysitter.
staying home with my bro looking after him and the house till my mom gets baq from here fucking ventures.
i feel like a 30yr old single mom.
kill me.
sigh. wish i had a book that told me how all the pieces fit together.
too bad. probably would have done alot of things differently.
and now a look baq on the memories of years passed:
2001 -taco bell
-pretending to go to that night thing during puasa(i cant remember wat its called)
2002 -robotics
-tampines mall
-jetti
2003 -hari's party
- sports day
-chucking my fone (lol)
-the dome
-soccer; rs vs sembawang
2004-coming to nz
- blinn (!!!)
-mt eden primary school and chris
- trying weed for the first time
- living with jake and liam
-selling windows
- tiaras bdae party
2005-finally doin my fashion design course
-margaritas
-drinking beers at seven with daniel
-e pills and p and mdma
-absinth
-going to skool with two hours of sleep and a hangover
-eating korean with steve
-snorting mdma and e and smokin weed with terry
-working at archies
-fingers
-going to the country forthe first time
wow thats a pretty hefty list..
all i have to say?
ummm....
for the good times, thanks it was great
fror the bad times, shit happens
for the ppl who never stopped believing in me, i love u guys
for the ppl who were cunts, youre always gonna be a cunt so jus go get fucked
for the highs, whoooaaa dude
for the lows, i owe my life to coffee and cigarettes
and for the rest of the time, im glad it went so fast
the song of the moment for me is definitely
There it Go (The Whistle Song) by Julez Santana
awesome awesome song
meow
realli.. its funny how ur life is jus laid out before you without u actualli havin any idea of whats going on around u.
when youre young u feel invincible. i still sorta do i guess. but you think you know everything and dat u know everything better den anyone else. dont listen to no one dont care about no one. there are the ppl u keep for the rest of your life and theres everyone else. its just so crazy looking back to rs and thinking about all the dumb things dat made "such the impact" on my life..
it just seems that everything i balwed my heart out for was sooo... trivial.
the real world is nothing like that. its fucked. you cant trust anyone but since that leaves u with no one u kinda just have to take your chances.. falling in out of love with different ppl.. its crazy how many times ive said i love you to someone in high skool. maybe 100. and it was all so cool. oh ive got a bf..
WOW
no shit.
it was all so easy and straightforward there. comfort in everything. over here? every day is a fight. u keep ur head down here. ppl dunt want to just be your friend. deres always a superior motive. there are exceptions of course as always. but i learnt to be smart the hard way.
a dark time in my life
im over it.
so why is it still haunting me.
why am i afraid of someone jus showing up in my own home.
why am i still drowning myself in alcohol and drugs
why do i wake up from bad dreams
its not going to happen again.
never.
i hope they find him and put him away.
ive grown so much.. probably more in these past two years then i have in my life. a whirlwind of new discovery. the journey of life yea? heh. sure...
haha its funny looking baq.. i was such a silly lil girl. haha gave da teachers a good amount of shit though. that was fun. i was so taking advantage of the fact that i was untouchable.
and now?
ive bin degraded to a babysitter.
staying home with my bro looking after him and the house till my mom gets baq from here fucking ventures.
i feel like a 30yr old single mom.
kill me.
sigh. wish i had a book that told me how all the pieces fit together.
too bad. probably would have done alot of things differently.
and now a look baq on the memories of years passed:
2001 -taco bell
-pretending to go to that night thing during puasa(i cant remember wat its called)
2002 -robotics
-tampines mall
-jetti
2003 -hari's party
- sports day
-chucking my fone (lol)
-the dome
-soccer; rs vs sembawang
2004-coming to nz
- blinn (!!!)
-mt eden primary school and chris
- trying weed for the first time
- living with jake and liam
-selling windows
- tiaras bdae party
2005-finally doin my fashion design course
-margaritas
-drinking beers at seven with daniel
-e pills and p and mdma
-absinth
-going to skool with two hours of sleep and a hangover
-eating korean with steve
-snorting mdma and e and smokin weed with terry
-working at archies
-fingers
-going to the country forthe first time
wow thats a pretty hefty list..
all i have to say?
ummm....
for the good times, thanks it was great
fror the bad times, shit happens
for the ppl who never stopped believing in me, i love u guys
for the ppl who were cunts, youre always gonna be a cunt so jus go get fucked
for the highs, whoooaaa dude
for the lows, i owe my life to coffee and cigarettes
and for the rest of the time, im glad it went so fast
the song of the moment for me is definitely
There it Go (The Whistle Song) by Julez Santana
awesome awesome song
meow
1 Comments:
you goon. my bday was in 2005. and hey you forgot the most important person.... DAVE. :p
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